February as a whole carries the emanations of Valentines Day. Its proximity causes every day to be a pondering of relationships past and hopefully yet to come. My own history books of the heart are spotty and interesting, but I know for certain that I still don't know what love is (in this context). The infatuation I know, but not the deeper burn and yearn. I think I look forward to that buried deep intertwining roots love of security and acceptance more than the initial flush and blush (though it does have it's charm).
Here's a quote from the blog of Lee Bozeman (All Things Bright and Beautiful) that made me think forward and deep.
"worked on a new song this week that I am calling "Stationery" and it has a nice feeling to it. just trying to put some words together that work. I suppose it is a love song though I don't know exactly what that means. when you are with the same person for sixteen years, that idea changes and you can't just call it love. it's too heavy. I wonder often why my wife loves me. the old things that brought us together are still there but buried beneath layers and layers, branches and branches of blossoming. there are no good images in this world of middle marriage. we long for young infatuation and we find old people in love adorable. in the middle, it is a wasteland. I wonder how things will change for us. it is a quiet afternoon. my wife is asleep upstairs."
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